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Thursday, July 27, 2017

Should We Judge? Do We Need To Be Perfect?

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Should we judge?  In my opinion, sometimes, yes, we should.

We live in a world where we are fed nonsense on a daily basis for various reasons - money, power, greed, celebrity or to attempt to bring down another, etc., etc. (nothing good).  (See No 911 Existed Yet For Kitty - How The Media Twists, Lies, Exaggerates)  Many readily accept this, even taking it as truth!


Yet, society today has this theory...  No one should ever judge.  In fact, no one should dare to say anything "negative" or they are labelled a hater!  That is, no one they personally know or have personal contact with in some way.

While they believe the muck of the media and celebrities, dare their neighbor speak a TRUTH and they want to condemn them!


I think it's preposterous.  It goes back to the whole society today thing.  (See Is Society Raising A Bunch Of Pansies?)

I've been judged and personally, I don't care!  I've never done anything illegal, never went out to hurt anyone, never intentionally harmed any living soul.  In fact, I've gone above and beyond to help many a soul, human and otherwise.


The way I see it, if you feel that you would have done a better job as a single mother, you could handle my disability better, that it's not a real disability, you would have said it better, done it better, whatever you think I wasn't good at, that's fine!

It's especially fine when those stating it have never done what I did or gone through what I went through/am going through.  (See 10 Signs It's Not A "Real" Disability!!!!! TAKE CHARGE OF YOUR HEALTH!)

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I do believe in the old saying:


If another single parent gives a suggestion, I'm all ears.  Few single parents ever knocked me, because they've been there and done that!  Few dealing with disabilities have told me how terrible I am at it because they too have been there and done that!

Anyone giving a suggestion or an opinion from the heart is welcome.  I take it all under consideration and will often take their advice.


However, if I robbed a bank and blamed it on my disability or being a single mom, I believe, yes, I should be judged by EVERYONE.  It's wrong, period the end, no matter the reasoning/motive. Anyone who says it's wrong is 100% correct.

Someone got mad at me one day back in the 90's.  They approached me on the job no less (we worked together) and said, "who are you to judge?"


My response:  "Well, hmmmmm, let's see, who am I?"
  • I'm the one who got you this job.
  • I'm the person who made sure you got to work, going out of my way to pick you up when your car broke down at least once a month.
  • I'm the one who drove you home too, getting home later myself. 
  • I trained you, staying late at times, with NO PAY, to help you learn something we were too busy to get to during working hours.
  • Even though I had two kids to feed, was going to school full-time, working full-time and going with 4 hours of sleep a night, I'm the one who took in extra left overs when YOU had nothing to eat for lunch. Yes, tired as I was, I took the time to pack my lunch, my kids' lunches and YOUR LUNCH. 
  • I'm the one who stayed on the phone with you for 3 hours two nights in a row listening to you cry and giving you darn good advice.
  • You came to MY condo at 11 p.m. when it was freezing out and your electricity was shut off.

I could go on, but.... I think you understand who I am to "judge."  But... this person, with their very limited, short, selective memory had the nerve to tell me I shouldn't judge, because... I'm not perfect!!!!!

It doesn't take perfection.  All it takes is to be a good person, common sense, a good memory, appreciation, courtesy, caring and morals!!!!!  When you take, take, take and then crap on someone, yes, they have every right to judge you.


NO ONE IS PERFECT.  I never claimed perfection.  Nor would I expect anyone to be perfect. No one on the Supreme Court is perfect, yet their job is to judge.  All of us regular people, none of us perfect, are expected to sit on juries and, well... JUDGE!


Who decided that it takes perfection to judge and why?

When you take, take, take, happy as a pig in sh*t when one is giving, don't get all perturbed when YOU do something and deserve to be judged. (See Willy Wonka! That's Not Me...)  Don't label someone a hater or mean or any other nonsense when you get judged!


The truth hurts, so society today, rather than face facts, is more interested in blowing smoke up people's butts and making excuses.  Yes, being kind, nice, sweet, caring is great. However, if we can't ever judge someone, ever say anything anyone deems negative, how do people learn, how do people take responsibility?

It seems society likes to play the game.  (See Too Many People Play These Games I Hate)


I'm not a believer in judging without knowing.  The old saying "Don't Judge A book By Its Cover" holds true.

CLICK VIDEO

The perfect example of this is Susan Boyle!  Initially, people judged a book by its cover and boy were they surprised!


Now... let's make no mistake.  Many people attempt to pass off uncalled for judgement as mere opinion.  There's a huge difference.

If you are judging someone or a group of people who are doing nothing illegal or harmful simply because you THINK you would do it differently or better, and you are attempting to disguise it as opinion, it doesn't fly. You are only fooling yourself.


  • A family with a young, terminally ill patient was judged (and harassed) over their choice of alternative treatment for their loved one. 
  • They were judged on the care, their choice of facility for traditional treatment, their decisions, etc.

Keep in mind, those judging knew NOTHING of the illness, NOTHING of the personal situation and had NEVER been in the same situation.  When you have no detailed information, it's absurd to say what you THINK you would and would not do.  

Very often, those who judge others unnecessarily, wind up doing the same things when they find themselves in the same situation!  Suddenly, it all makes sense.  Those who judged others and swore they would never fundraise.... start fundraising.  


Such a terrible tragedy.  

Three year old twin boys were discovered in their backyard pool yesterday here on Long Island.  Both died.  What a horrific tragedy!

Sadly, many sat behind their computers, in hiding, safe in their homes, and rather than express sympathy, typed very judgmental, harsh words about the incident.  They did this without all the facts, even making up scenarios in their own minds!  Crazy. And downright wrong.


Should you judge?  I do believe that sometimes, yes, people deserve to be judged and be held accountable.  Do you need to be perfect to do it?  I do not believe so.

Should you judge, harass in the name of opinion?  Should you judge those who simply do things differently?  Should you judge without all the facts?  Should you judge when it's not harmful, hurtful or illegal?  Absolutely not. 



For those who are religious, basically, the meaning is exactly what I'm saying.  Learn what it really means! Thou shall not judge - well... not exactly!

When someone says, "how dare you judge me" my feelings are "how dare you do what you did!"


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